Can we step back for a moment here so I can recount just how smart I am? Okay good. So last night I showed up at the University Bookstore to hear Sam Goslings talk about What Your Stuff Says About You. I wasn't planning on buying the book but I found what he had to say so compelling I grabbed a copy and stepped in line to have him sign it. Also, it didn't hurt that he had a charming British accent.
The two ladies in front of me were super obnoxious. When he asked them if he should include their name one replied with, "Write something pithy!" and the other one replied with, "Write something witty!". Ah, how charming of them, right? Be funny...1, 2, 3, go! I leaned forward to see what he was actually writing and it was just that, "Something witty, Sam Goslings". Ha, suckers.
Anyways, I was up next. I didn't even have him sign my name. I was good with just a signature. This will be important later in the story. I think this is what folks call foreshadowing. (No, actually this is what folks call bad storytelling.) So I walked downstairs to checkout, buy my book, getting my parking validated and get the hell out of dodge because it was past 8 PM and my stomach was starting to rumble.
I get up to the front counter, and that's when I realize this huge purse I'm carrying which holds my umbrella, my hat, 2 scarfs, 27 gift cards to places I never go, 3 tubes of lip gloss, my mileage log for business trips, my bus pass and 3 iPods is missing on key item. My wallet.
So then I had to put the book down (good thing it didn't have my name in it!), walk out to my car and explain to the parking attendant smarty pants forgot her wallet at home. His response was, "you owe $3". So I had to review the whole not having a wallet thing with him one more time. Apparently I'm not the only one whose elevator doesn't always make it to the top floor. So that made me feel slightly better. But not good enough. I still want that book! Fascinating.
I had a similar experience in a parking garage recently. I felt like crap. But not as badly as I felt when I almost ran over a homeless man on the way out of the garage.
Snoop looks interesting, I'll definitely check it out!
Posted by: Pants | Thursday, 19 June 2008 at 11:15 AM
I really did enjoy tyhat story, but please - please, next time, have the name in the book - I promise it will be so much more fun.
Posted by: Chris | Thursday, 19 June 2008 at 12:29 PM
Pants, It's probably not as cool as Twilight but what the fuck is?
Chris, Next time I'm going to hand him the book and say, "1, 2, 3, go!" and then tell him my name is Chris and spell it out for him just in case. That's C-H-R-I-S D-A... :)
Posted by: sprizee | Thursday, 19 June 2008 at 04:36 PM
You know, your "27 gift cards to places I never go" statement just gave me an idea. WOuldn't it be nice to have a gift card swap meet? Everybody brings along the gift cards they ahve to places they never go in hopes of trading them for gift cards to places they do go.
Hey, this could be then next tupperware, only you can't put stuff inside it cause it's just an idea...now I am rambling, outta here am I.
Posted by: Chris | Friday, 20 June 2008 at 06:25 AM
Chris - There is a website to swap gift cards. There's a couple actually.
Posted by: Tiffany | Saturday, 21 June 2008 at 01:51 PM
Tiffany - Everyone is always stealing all of my good ideas.
Posted by: Chris | Sunday, 22 June 2008 at 04:27 PM
Aw, that's a great bookstore. The memories of purchasing college textbooks there. Sucks that you had to put the book down. I like how you tell a story. Well done.
Posted by: egan | Wednesday, 25 June 2008 at 11:19 AM